Coming to Terms with Imperfection

    d466w imperfectionIntellectually I understand (and even accept) that part and parcel of being human is having F-I-Qs (foibles, “isms” and quirks) as well as being imperfect.

    For some reason, I am very understanding and forgiving of F-I-Qs, both in myself and others. (Perhaps that’s simply a “quirk” of my nature. lol)

    It’s the being imperfect and making mistakes part of being human I have a harder time with. (Particularly when it comes to myself.) Reminders (a.k.a. helpful hints) about the choices available when I’ve made mistakes (and/or experienced real-time examples of my imperfections) help clarify and put things into perspective. (It’s the choices part that is particularly appreciated as it leaves me with a feeling of empowerment. Always a good.)

    If you make mistakes, then you have choices. You can:
    *Learn and grow.
    *Ignore and stagnate.
    *Drag it with you for ever.
    *Leave the experience behind.

    [Personal observation: If you ignore the lesson, then you can keep repeating it … over … and over … and over again.]

    If you’re imperfect, then you have choices. You can:
    *Bemoan your imperfection.
    *Celebrate your imperfection.
    *Overcome your imperfection.
    *Be your imperfection.

    [My interpretation of the last on the list — the “being” part — channels the Zen/Buddha philosophies of unconditional acceptance.]

    If you glean something of value from this and are inclined to share, please feel free to do so.

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    Star - June 22, 2016 - 4:19 am

    I once was something of a perfectionist.
    Being a journalist helped lessen that tendency. A mistake made today was best learned from and left behind, because there were plenty of new ones where that came from.
    Having a broken ankle has almost cured me. I see things that need doing, that I want to do … and I can’t [not yet, anyway].
    I occasionally slip back into the old perfection habit, but am quickly reminded just how human I am.
    It’s a good lesson. Thank you for taking a good look at it, Tana.

    Tana Bevan - June 22, 2016 - 9:41 am

    Star~”A mistake made today was best … left behind, because there were plenty of new ones where that came from.” Talk about an “ah ha” moment! That is the best reason I’ve ever heard for actually letting go. No need to do the hanging on thing (a great past-time for those who like to chastise themselves over things they can’t change! lol) because there’s no shortage. No need to stockpile ammo for beating yourself up. No need at all. There’ll be more mistakes to be had. And, I betcha when you get into the swing of things and accept there’ll be more mistakes waiting in the wings, they hold less power. Thank you sooooooooooooooo much for that “ah ha”!!!!

    kath unsworth - July 4, 2016 - 4:52 pm

    Tana as I age I accept my imperfections much better, but I still to this day hate making mistakes and they stay with me. The reward I guess I do learn from them. My biggest challenge watching my kids make mistakes and letting them learn, we want to fix everything but its better if we let them go through the process and learn as we have.

    Tana Bevan - July 5, 2016 - 7:56 pm

    Kath~I agree with you about how difficult it is to watch our children make their own mistakes. Intellectually I understand the need for it … the whole caterpillar turning into a butterfly thing … but it’s sooooooooo hard to watch. Especially when the mistakes they make hurt them. Still, as you say, it’s a process and they need to learn as we have.