The good news is, where you have been has nothing to do with where you are going.
That doesn’t mean when you decide to clean up your act today, every stupid, thoughtless, or cruel thing you’ve done is magically erased.
It does mean just because you made poor decisions in the past, you don’t have to make poor decisions in the future.
It also means to change where you are going; you have to change your thoughts.
Simply changing the words coming out of your mouth or circling around in your mind is not enough. You have to feel the desired change, feel the shift deep inside you. The change has to become a part of you and be sincere.
If you find yourself accepting your human foibles on an intellectual level while wrestling with their existence on an emotional level, you are not alone. Humanness is the drawback of being human.
By realizing you made a mistake or hurt another, and you sincerely change your thinking and behavior so you don’t do that or anything similar again, you are moving toward something better. By focusing on, and spreading a bit more of the high end of the emotional spectrum ‑‑ hope, joy, kindness ‑‑ you’ll find yourself moving toward that something better at a faster pace.
Taking responsibility for your mistakes means learning from them. It also means when you have learned your lesson, have sincerely and consciously changed for the better, you need to let it go.
There’s a forward-moving continuum in effect. When a person helps you in your time of need, it is rare you can return in kind. However, you can help another in their time of need. When you wrong a person, it is unlikely you can truly right the wrong, repair the rift, or make things whole again. However, you can refrain from wronging others. Also, by choosing to share your experience, both of the wrong and its fallout, you can perhaps help another from making that same wrong.
In the end, if you put forth the sincere effort to change for the better, where you have been doesn’t have to predict where you are going.
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